My Grandmother

[gamooma]

I realise that nobody cares, but I can't help myself. I haven't whinged about anything to anyone today and I'm having withdrawal symptoms. So I'm going to whinge about my grandmother.

I walked in the door this morning and she immediately told me she didn't like my top. Then she offered me some facial clensing shit, which I took offense to. My face is not that bad, ok? Anyway, then she goes off into this big rant about how my cousin's boyfriend is really great and his parents own this and his parents own that and he makes so much money a year. I knew she was going to get around to nagging me about why I haven't got a boyfriend yet (I'm female). You know you're pathetic when your own grandmother thinks you need to get layed. :(

Sometimes I just want to tell her to shove it up her ass, but she's my GRANDMOTHER. You just can't say things like that to old people, can you?

[Fuzzy Dice]

Sometimes you have to. But my relationship with my grandma through my pappy's side (god rest her soul) was really great as i got older. It's nice to have an 83 year old little old lady who is in all things very nice and proper sit down at a table of you and your friends and have a drink with you (granted, we were drinking beer and grams loved her sherry, but still). My grandma rocked. I MISS YOU GRAMS! Cheers to ya!

[pleed]

King oath you can. Call her a "crabby old cunt".
My grandma is cool. She used to let me read penthouse when I was about 7. (they weren't her penthouses you sicko's).
Tell your grandmother that you are gay and looking for a nice female to settle with, she will be shocked and never mention it again.

[cherry]

I refer you to the Meat Market (http://forums.zgeek.com/forumdisplay.php?s=&forumid=44) :D

[Spingo]

Originally posted by gamooma
You know you're pathetic when your own grandmother thinks you need to get layed. :(

Welcome to my world.. *sighs*

[Chocoholic]

I hear you. There is a whole heap of family politics in my family and my Nana is at the head of it. I think my Nana is probably the most to blame for me and my older sister not talking for the last 10 years. My Nana started at me before I was in high school by telling me my parents were wasting their money giving me an education and lets not mention my weight, choice of clothing or lack of boy friend. I became a teenager and I remember my Mum dragging my by the ear away from a Christmas dinner, after a bit of name calling. My Dad is awesome though he always backs me up and will often take offence on my behalf.

As my Dad says I come from a long line of bitches.

[sperm]

Originally posted by gamooma
why I haven't got a boyfriend yet (I'm female). You know you're pathetic when your own grandmother thinks you need to get layed. :(

maybe it has something to do with the fact that you are only 16 !!

btw - belated happy birthdays for yesterday .....

[Chocoholic]

Its my grandmothers 80th birthday on the weekend. As she is single I was thinking I should buy her a vibrator.


Hmm while my Dad would laugh my Mum would kill me, so smelly soaps it is. That way she can try and scrab that old person smell off herself and get laid.

[gamooma]

Originally posted by sperm
btw - belated happy birthdays for yesterday .....

Thanks dude. I got $50 from my grandmother. She says I should use it to buy some nice clothes because the boys will never like me if I dress like that. Her words, not mine. I've given up on reasoning with her and now I'm just avoiding her.

[sperm]

tell her boys like you best if you are not dressed at all ! ;)

then the $50 is used for drinks :D
(or in line with chocoholic, a vibrator for yourself :p )

[pliskin]

my nan on my mums side is very cool for a person in her mid 70's.
she is very independent, having an active spcial life and a large group of friends. there is nothing bad i can say about her!

[annie]

i cant talk to my oma (grandmother). not that shes not anice lady, shes the sweetest
i just dont speak her language :p

and the fact taht she lives on the other side of the world (in holland) sorta prevents me from talking to her even if i could.
hmmm

but never fear! i have my mother still to tell me im fat and to drop hints about my friends (she thinks thier bad) etc etc.... oh what fun, but you ppl have it worse so ill go into this little hole here and examine my toenails.

[Nandragon]

Originally posted by Chocoholic
Its my grandmothers 80th birthday on the weekend. As she is single I was thinking I should buy her a vibrator.


Hmm while my Dad would laugh my Mum would kill me, so smelly soaps it is. That way she can try and scrab that old person smell off herself and get laid.

How bout stinky soap in the shape of a penis?
Or edible sex candies?:p