Are you an awp-whore?

[Fuzzy Dice]

When you play counter-strike, do you routinely buy the AWP sniper rifle? Yes? Let me guess, you also have a desert eagle for a pistol, right?

If you are an awp monkey, you can kiss my irish-white ass. You are a fucking waste of bandwidth. You are taking up a spot on a server that could be used by someone who will not make the game a frustrating endeavor to enjoy.

You may have noticed that certain maps (most of the hostage rescue maps) are designed in such a way that the most sensible approach for play as a Terrorist is to remain in the general vicinity of the hostages and watch the entrances. To camp. Fine. This is how the level was designed.

Now the methods of ingress and egress for the Counter-Terrorists are limited in these levels. And there are many points placed along these routs that are condusive to sniping.

Well-balanced teams will ensure that the game-play is lively and fun. Unfortunately, the teams are almost never well-balanced and a very large proportion of players are what we call 'fucktards.' The skill level of a fucktard is usually not that high. Now, the second a fucktard starts to lose, he will resort to name-calling, almost-always calling into question wether or not the player who delivered him unto the afterlife lounge is a cheater - a 'hacker' or 'h4xx0r', if you will. If said fucktard continues to lose, generally speaking, he/she will buy an awp and proceed to make a fucking nuisance out of his/her worthless ass, until capped by someone with the necessary skills. Namely, me.

There is another class of awper, the habitual awper, who only ever uses other guns because they haven't acquired the in game affluence to purchase the rifle in question. These types of people invariably pick the team that has the greatest advantage on any given map. They also tend to work in clusters. So what you will find then, after several minutes of fairly satisfying play, is that you are confronted with a fortress guarded by at least two awps, more likely three, and sometimes as many as five or six. These ass-mongers will also be chattering away on their microphones and laughing about their behaviour.

You try getting into the house on cs_militia when there are three awpers on the roof and the sewers are guarded by another two, one per exit. Sure is FUN isn't it?

You worthless peices of shit. Play the fucking game like you actually give a flying fuck about the people you're playing against, instead of your fucking stats on your friends' fucking server. You fucking fragwhore. I hope you get sodomized by a big fucking bear. yeah a bear. And as that bear is pounding your ass and growling away in bear-ecstacy, I hope a bunch of other bears see what is going on and line up to do a train on your ass. And when you're camping on the roof in militia, and a ct peeks out from behind a box and nails you with a headshot from an m4? You're welcome choda-gargler, that was me. And when you're being all stealthy and quiet, peering out from your hidey-hole and a HE grenade sails in and turns your ass into kibble? That was me. And when a ct pops out nearby with a TMP and you try in vain to awp him as he riddles you with little pissy-tmp bullets until you drop? Me again, bitch. Kisses from heaven, cock-holes. Hold on to your asses, ass-holders, because i'm coming to get you.

Awpers piss me off.

[Fuzzy Dice]

heh.

[RASPUTIN]

Whats the go about the DE.

I love that gun as I can get a longish distance head shot with it.

Now the awp is a sucky gun which although I would buy it I don't as I usually die pretty fast due to a Quake upbringing so don't bother wasting money on it. I like the mp5, de and he grenade combo. Does me ok.

[Fuzzy Dice]

not so much about the DE, just that awpers always have one - it's got more power than most of the rifles you can buy, it's like a hand awp, except that it actually takes a modicum of skill to use.

fucking awpers. *shakes fist*

[Afta Image]

At the risk of setting you off again, why dont you get them back by getting your own awp and snippering them off?

[Fuzzy Dice]

Originally posted by Afta Image
At the risk of setting you off again, why dont you get them back by getting your own awp and snippering them off?

Because i'm not a fucking pussy.

[Conny!]

Why don't you play on servers that ban AWP's?

But what do i know, i'm probably one of those fucktards with no skill you talk about.:)

[scathing]

Given that I'm shit with a sniper rifle (why be accurate when I can lay down a rain of lead?), I tend to buy it only when I'm on a side that's winning all the time, and I have more dollars than I know what to do with.

Either that or, if I'm playing against really shit players, I'll go Scout.

[Fuzzy Dice]

Originally posted by St. Anger
Why don't you play on servers that ban AWP's?

But what do i know, i'm probably one of those fucktards with no skill you talk about.:)

because they're damn near impossible to find and when you DO find them, they're either password protected or so far away that the ping is absolute shit.

How to tell if you are a fucktard:
- If you accuse anyone who is doing well of being a hacker (ie - of having a wall hack, because they HEARD you coming you dipshit retard, use your fucking walk button)
- If you NEVER shut up on your microphone.
- If your trash talk includes racial slurs
- If you routinely TYPE your bitching and whingeing about the circumstances of your death in the afterlife lounge.
- If you flashbang your own teammates so that you can get kills before they do. (statwhore/fragwhore)

[scathing]

Originally posted by Fuzzy Dice
How to tell if you are a fucktard:
- If you accuse anyone who is doing well of being a hacker (ie - of having a wall hack, because they HEARD you coming you dipshit retard, use your fucking walk button)
- If you NEVER shut up on your microphone.
- If you flashbang your own teammates so that you can get kills before they do. (statwhore/fragwhore)

Or, instead, turn your fucking speakers on and use a sound card that supports STEREO, so you can also figure how I can tell what direction people are coming at me from.

If you play random .wav files (like Simpsons and SouthPark soundbites) using the speech function.

And flashbanging your own team mates so the opponents are busy shooting them, giving you ample opportunity to hit the opponents while they're distracted.

[Conny!]

Originally posted by Fuzzy Dice
because they're damn near impossible to find and when you DO find them, they're either password protected or so far away that the ping is absolute shit.

How to tell if you are a fucktard:
- If you accuse anyone who is doing well of being a hacker (ie - of having a wall hack, because they HEARD you coming you dipshit retard, use your fucking walk button)
- If you NEVER shut up on your microphone.
- If your trash talk includes racial slurs
- If you routinely TYPE your bitching and whingeing about the circumstances of your death in the afterlife lounge.
- If you flashbang your own teammates so that you can get kills before they do. (statwhore/fragwhore)

When i use to play there was heaps of servers which banned AWP's. Guess it must be where you are.

This guy i know use to be so fucking awseme that he got called a hacker so many times he ended up getting banned from heaps of servers. It was because he knew where ppl camped and knew where to shoot through a wall to get them, and he was a good player anyway. But if it looks like your using wall hack, you must be:rolleyes:

I guess i'm not a fucktard. I'm just shit at CS:(

[scathing]

Originally posted by St. Anger
This guy i know use to be so fucking awseme that he got called a hacker so many times he ended up getting banned from heaps of servers. It was because he knew where ppl camped and knew where to shoot through a wall to get them

Happens to me on a regular basis, too. I got called a wallhacker because I saw someone run into cover behind a box, and then I just emptied half a clip from a M4A1 into the corner of the box where most people sit when they "wait".

It wasn't quite as amusing as getting called a wallhacker for shooting a guy through a box when I saw the barrel of his rifle pointing out from the side of it.


l33t-masta: "OMG ch33t0rz! H0w did j00 C m3?"

Me: "Your fucking gun was sticking out from behind cover, you stupid goddamn camper."

[Conny!]

Originally posted by scathing
Happens to me on a regular basis, too. I got called a wallhacker because I saw someone run into cover behind a box, and then I just emptied half a clip from a M4A1 into the corner of the box where most people sit when they "wait".

It wasn't quite as amusing as getting called a wallhacker for shooting a guy through a box when I saw the barrel of his rifle pointing out from the side of it.


l33t-masta: "OMG ch33t0rz! H0w did j00 C m3?"

Me: "Your fucking gun was sticking out from behind cover, you stupid goddamn camper."

LOL:D Thats excellent. I try that shit, and the dude will jump out and carve me:rolleyes: well sometimes i get 'em.

[Fuzzy Dice]

Don't get booted nearly as much as my friend ryan (he uses the tag Turd Furgeson [Wablammo!]) He used to get banned from servers left and right for getting too many consecutive headshots, shooting people through walls, basically for being the best goddamn cs player i have ever seen.

my tag is fuzzy dice [wablammo!]...is actually where my avatar name came from

Wablammo! is our pseudo clan. We went on a rampant autoshotty rampage a while back and added it to our names as a joke. People are fucking clanwhores. When we join a server and start doing really well, we will almost always be asked to join a league or if people can join our clan. Last time we checked, there were like ten or so other people who'd added [Wablammo!] to their taglines. (two being our respective roomates, as we now live in different cities)

[aiken drum]

AWP's are a part of the game so get over it. If you can't handle someone who is good with one play another game. Sure they can be frustrating when in the hands of someone really good, but you have to learn how to dodge, or move in a manner that the awper isn't going to expect. Try using some flash bangs to gain some ground. Coming accross a good awper doesn't automatically spell your death.

Nothing is more satisfying than getting an AK headshot against an awper from the otherside of the map.

[RASPUTIN]

Originally posted by h3@ven53nt
--on a side note, have a sense of humour about CS, and treat those people doggedly hanging on to what is a rapidly dying community (i blame steam kthx) with the same patience you would a hyperactive goanna.

Not that I play CS very much and give a damn about any other games than BF1942 and UT2003 but what makes you say that its rapidly dying?

I reckon that as long as the majority of people still use P2's or low end p3's CS will live a long life. Shit I am reserecting my old P2/233 for a linux server abd I'll probably make it dual boot so CS can be installed on it (my kids love CS).

Hehe I guess it is a true statement for those lucky enough to have a decent pc. As soon as you play BF1942 CS looks pretty jaded.

[Fuzzy Dice]

Originally posted by h3@ven53nt
--on a side note, have a sense of humour about CS, and treat those people doggedly hanging on to what is a rapidly dying community (i blame steam kthx) with the same patience you would a hyperactive goanna.

dude - rant. obviously i'd just finished playing cs and gotten myself awped back into the stone age.

On milita. With five - yes FIVE (5) awpers.

[robotoverflow]

Ouch, i've had similar nightmares. That was around the time I swore off CS forever.

Be smart and follow suit. :p

[Colonel Kurtz]

YEah, sometimes you just get so frustrated that you want to scream.....

But then you just get clever again and hunt them down. I get this playing tac-ops. It's quite satisying firing your pistol into the back of the sniper's head.

That said, i quite often play sniper. To be successful at it though, you still have to be good at the rest of the game and weapons. Still reckon I do better with an M4/M203 combo than anything else.

Snipers are part of the games....either join 'em or fuck em up..

Remember......RUN...DODGE...JUMP...WEAVE...

And a bit of cooperative fire and movement can't hurt either.

[robotoverflow]

Tac-ops seems to be way better than CS though I have a problem with the way that everyone jumps all over the place to avoid getting hit badly. It's a bit like CS before the jump slowdown was introduced.

[still life]

just wait for CS:Condition Zero in a month or so

CS REBORN

[robotoverflow]

I... try not to think about it.

[edeity]

U R 4LL GH3Y

[zerothru7]

here is a little flash game you might enjoy wasting some time with.



http://www.camperstrike.co.uk/

[scathing]

Originally posted by h3@ven53nt
yes..... a month....

Is this one of those months as measured in 'just 5 minutes' when any female is engaged in any activity whatsoever?

No, its the "next few months" timescale that the guys developing Duke Nukem Forever are using.