worst fictional character

[ttpuk]

we've seen the best now how about the worst?
characters that make you want to tear up the book and salt it for good measure!

how about:

thomas covenant from stephen donaldsons books. 6 books the size of bricks filled with enough depression to finish nearly every zgeek out there!
DO NOT READ!

[ShinymetalASS]

See I find this a bit hard because you get a character pretty fully in a book... and some of them I havent liked because they have been arseholes, but it doesnt make them a bad character, particularly if they are doing their job and making you mad.

Unfortunately, even though it is one of my favourite series of all time, I have to say Frodo. What a boring little fuckar. Whenever I read (and re-read and re-read, etc) the series its all I can do not to skim over the bullshit Frodo crap. I dont care if he is carrying the one ring and it is a burden. Stop being such a boring little fuckar and stop poncing around and get some action into you!

From a movie I'm staying that lot from ghostworld who took a good comic and made a movie full of tossers i just didnt give a rats arse about. Not even steve buscemi and he's always good...... "Man am I glad I called THAT guy!"

[Arsozah]

Oh, Frodo bugs me too. He doesn't bug me nearly as much in the books as he did in the movies, but that's a rant for another forum.

The character that I hate, absolutely irrationally hate to the point where I will argue with the book everytime she appears is Eddings' Polgara. I hate her. Simply cannot deal with her at all. Unfortunately, since hate is beyond all reason, I can't explain why. She just really really riles me up.

Interestingly enough though is that Sephrenia (Elenium/Tamuli) and Dweia (Redemption of Althalus) who both have Polgara-like tendencies don't bug me nearly as much.

I just want to grab Polgara's soapbox and ram it up her sanctimonious ass.

[ShinymetalASS]

I just want to grab Polgara's soapbox and ram it up her sanctimonious ass.

Yeah I hear that. Particularly when she's all up in Belgarath's face. I mean, he's a cool old [read: ancient] bloke who just wants a beer and to get the job done. Polgara is a good example of why men think all women are whingers. You do understand her a little better in Polgara the Sorceress though. And being a girl who is very friendly and compassionate irl, but who is told that I am standoffish, etc, I can see how someone can be a really good person, but their defensive nature can keep ppl away. Polgara did lose her twin after all.

Plus I just finished Da Vinci code and arent there a bunch of contrived 2-d annoying characters in that?

P.S. Something tells me you and I, arsozah, could keep the whole book forum going on our own.

[gunsella]

Plus I just finished Da Vinci code and arent there a bunch of contrived 2-d annoying characters in that?



i was just about to post Robert Langdon of DVC fame.

but seeing as you beat me to the post, i'll have to go with:

Scarecrow, Matthew Reilly's action hero with a scar running down his left eye.

[t101]

Any character (or book for that matter) by Dean R Koontz. The man can't write an interesting character to save his life, and his books all end with extreme lameness.

[Arsozah]

P.S. Something tells me you and I, arsozah, could keep the whole book forum going on our own.

You're on, Shiny. Let's do it ;)

[s3raph]

What you mean like the "characters" in those stupid pony books for pre-teen girls? There are so many awful works of fiction how are we meant to pick out individual characters?

[Aardvark]

Towley, you're the worst character ever

An ex of mine really hated Arwen. She was always calm and collected, except while forcing me to sit through lord of the rings during one of arwen's bits. I'm told that she got one line and a footnote in the books, which I refuse to read.

Worst character ever? Just about every fucking psycho serial killer out of every psycho serial killer novel out there. I know people catch them by picking up their patterns, but for fuck's sake, if their patterns were that fucking predictable, police would be able to catch them BEFORE they ever killed anyone. Actually, all the characters in those novels suck.

[badpauly]

Jesus.

'nuf said.

[ttpuk]

just to clarify:
im looking for characters that you just wanna punch so hard!
im not looking for nasty characters as such cause some of them are really good fun to read (thrawn).
i agree with SMA about the frodo and sam characters, they just moan all the time about anything. any excuse for a good cry. in fact i think there all gay and got up to some funny stuff which is why they were always tired.

[Sparhawk]

I'm told that she got one line and a footnote in the books, which I refuse to read.
That's true. She didn't even get with Aragorn but we've got to give Liv Tyler a big role...

Wistan and Mendark. What a pair of cockheads.
Aloysius Knight annoyed me because he was simply a clone of Schofield in every way. Only he killed people. Ooooh.
Jacen Solo. For god's sake shut the fuck up and do something constructive.


And gunsella, Scarecrow has scars on both eyes :)

[Eds]

That millionaire baddie guy from "Scarecrow" was pretty crap. And I agree on the Robert Langdon call, too although "Sir" Leigh Teabing shit me more.

Also, any of these "former SAS soldier-turned-writer" idiots who write from first-person perspective in their books. They all suck.

Stan Uris and Mike Hanlon from Stephen King's "It". I loved this book but the more I think about it, the more those guys just look like "Token Jewish Character" and "Token Black Character". King does that a lot.

[Hairyman]

What about Elric of Melnibone in the Champions Eternal Series?

[locust]

Jacen Solo. For god's sake shut the fuck up and do something constructive.


Well, since you didn't say Jar Jar we're obviously not counting prequels..

But even with that restriction I don't think Jacen's that annoying. If I had to pick anyone for annoying, it'd be latter-day Luke and Mara. Who woulda thought that taking a relationship from fanfic and putting it into the canon would make it worse?

[druckfugged]

Jesus.

'nuf said.


What book was he in?

...but seriously folks, any of Charles Dickens' protagonists- boring fuckers one and all. I reckon if Charles Dickens were alive and writing today none of his books would actually ever get published.

[Thyrd]

All of the Pokemon. What the fuck are they supposed to be?

All of the Brady bunch. Gh3y!

[badpauly]

just to clarify:
im looking for characters that you just wanna punch so hard!

I'll say again - Jesus.

[Hairyman]

Has anyone read the Ghormenghast series? I struggled to get into it but finally exploded 2/3 of the way through the first book. All of the characters were fuck-ups.

[Sparhawk]

I'd agree with Mara actually, but only since for some reason no author developed her character at all in the last 20 books. The constant gushing is lame too, but I want to punch the authors in the face more than Luke or Mara themselves.

[Hippy Vindalou]

What about Elric of Melnibone in the Champions Eternal Series?

What about him? I thought he was great, though he is a miserable fucker 90% of the time. I love all the eternal champions stories, Michael Moorcock writes some true fantasy stories with truly bizarre worlds.

Has anyone read the Ghormenghast series? I struggled to get into it but finally exploded 2/3 of the way through the first book. All of the characters were fuck-ups.

I'm with you there man, that book had a great premise to it, I like the idea of the castle so big even the few occupants could get lost for weeks but christ the characters were horrible.
I just couldnt get into it and didnt even make it a third of the way through. I keep meaning to force myself to finish it one day but its been sitting on the shelf for the last ten years and I just havent been bored enough to pick it up.